Monday, October 20, 2008

The Families' Thoughts - Baby Shower

Once again the members of the other 4 families of the Scranton Business Park have convened to discuss the activities over at Dunder Mifflin. We are joined by Bob Vance of Vance Refrigeration, Paul "Cool Guy" Faust of Disaster Kits Limited, W.B. Jones of W.B. Jones Heating and Cooling and Bill Cress of Cress Tool and Dye.

So, without further ado, we present the thoughts of the men who run the Scranton Business Park, sent in directly from them.

W.B. Jones' Grade A Badass Review: What planet does Michael Scott come from? He holds a baby shower for the broad who jilted him and who was impregnated by a sperm donor. Then he lets her tell him who he can and can't be in a relationship with?? He's not a man, he's a mouse! Now, Dwight on the other hand ........ you've got to be a real man to do your own circumcision.

Cress' Convo: Dwight is an idiot! If he is going to get knocked up he should be having a Kiwi, much smaller than a Watermelon, less painful.

Vance's View: While there are many expressions that could be used to describe Michael's relationship with Jan; I shall refrain from the most accurate and devastating because of my belief in: "Judge not lest ye be judged." That said, however; it is a sick-twisted affair that even SIGMUND FREUD with a fresh Colombian 8-ball couldn't begin to unravel -- so I won't even begin. I will say that all of Bob's BABY-MAMA'S certainly knew better than to pull stunts like Jan -- and when the highlight of ANY event is an acappella: 'SON OF A PREACHER MAN' you know you're in for one grueling affair. But thank goodness for Phyllis! Does my little Lady know how to put together a party and save the day, or what? But quite naturally, my concerns rest with ASTRID; who looks to be in for quite a ride.

Cool Guy Paul's Cool Thoughts: I am very worried about making comments this week as I don't want to get Dwight in trouble. I recognized immediately his knowledge of the need to be prepared for all situations and to take nothing for granted. As such...I have offered him a job at Disaster Kits Limited if things don't work out at Dunder Mifflin.

As always we have to thank the men BEHIND the men behind Scranton - Bobby Ray Shafer (Bob Vance), Paul Faust (Cool Guy Paul), Barry Sigismondi (W.B. Jones) and Terrence Beasor (Bill Cress) for their amazing willingness to share with us and all the Dunderheads out there!

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